Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
