When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
