bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
These tits shall not be calmed
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
