I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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