do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Randomize