Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize