New low: just hacked my moms facebook
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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