Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
