made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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