If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
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