My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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