I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
