Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
