The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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