I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
