I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
