We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
