So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
