I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
