worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Randomize