Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
