he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
