I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
