My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize