So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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