i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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