he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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