i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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