a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
