I puked a lego.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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