its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
