I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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