I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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