yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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