hotel room ftw
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'm always down for nudity.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize