Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
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