walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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