I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
