I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
