Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
No subtext here. People are naked.
she peed on how many people?
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
