Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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