No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
