She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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