Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
