Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize