She is in my trunk
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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