Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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