How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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