Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
