No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I want to fling myself into the sun
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
